Comments on: Are You Sure You Want To Resolve Conflict? http://lancehaun.com/are-you-sure-you-want-to-resolve-conflict/ Life between the brackets Wed, 16 May 2012 18:31:22 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.2 By: Richard http://lancehaun.com/are-you-sure-you-want-to-resolve-conflict/#comment-2264 Richard Sun, 20 Nov 2011 17:27:37 +0000 http://rehaul.com/?p=1629#comment-2264 In any dispute, there must be at least acknowledgement with both problems that a problem exists. If either party doesn't agree a problem exists, how successful would creating a conflict be? Also the cost to the employee as well for bringing the conflict to light. The reason that a lot of these problems in the workplace exist, is because on one hand management says that you can address a problem.The reality is another story altogether. So often when a problem has been discussed one on one it stays unresolved and it needs to be taken to the next level. In many cases the parties in which you are going to (Personnel) know about the problem. In many public sector positions, the posture is to remove the problem any way they can depending on the severity of the issue. This does not bode well for many public employees when the reality becomes that they investigate you.The result being that the employee no longer complains and finally leaves the employment rather than face continual humiliation. In any dispute, there must be at least acknowledgement with both problems that a problem exists. If either party doesn’t agree a problem exists, how successful would creating a conflict be? Also the cost to the employee as well for bringing the conflict to light. The reason that a lot of these problems in the workplace exist, is because on one hand management says that you can address a problem.The reality is another story altogether. So often when a problem has been discussed one on one it stays unresolved and it needs to be taken to the next level. In many cases the parties in which you are going to (Personnel) know about the problem. In many public sector positions, the posture is to remove the problem any way they can depending on the severity of the issue. This does not bode well for many public employees when the reality becomes that they investigate you.The result being that the employee no longer complains and finally leaves the employment rather than face continual humiliation.

]]> By: Jane http://lancehaun.com/are-you-sure-you-want-to-resolve-conflict/#comment-2263 Jane Sun, 05 Dec 2010 23:47:27 +0000 http://rehaul.com/?p=1629#comment-2263 if a confilict resolution is workable, then the assumption must be both parties having a 'shared understanding' that is 'why / what '. often the 'shared understanding' is very difficult to find as the question is 'do you really trust the other party and therefore let them to know all the truth and thoughts going through your head'??? at this moment, I have been going through this, having a confilict with my boss, and confront with him, received an apology, but with load of words to defend himshelf meanwhile. I simply do not trust him anymore and thinking of quiting. but the problem is I love what I am doing because I am very good at it, and earned lots of respect from my customers. I think of talking to HR, but I do not trust them either, as this just an employee vs one of the manager who may have big value to the company at present than an employee who can be replaced. if a confilict resolution is workable, then the assumption must be both parties having a ‘shared understanding’ that is ‘why / what ‘. often the ‘shared understanding’ is very difficult to find as the question is ‘do you really trust the other party and therefore let them to know all the truth and thoughts going through your head’???
at this moment, I have been going through this, having a confilict with my boss, and confront with him, received an apology, but with load of words to defend himshelf meanwhile. I simply do not trust him anymore and thinking of quiting. but the problem is I love what I am doing because I am very good at it, and earned lots of respect from my customers.
I think of talking to HR, but I do not trust them either, as this just an employee vs one of the manager who may have big value to the company at present than an employee who can be replaced.

]]> By: Richard http://lancehaun.com/are-you-sure-you-want-to-resolve-conflict/#comment-2262 Richard Sat, 20 Nov 2010 18:03:46 +0000 http://rehaul.com/?p=1629#comment-2262 I agree that conflict MUST be present if there are changes to occour. But even in low level issues avoidance sometimes becomes "Default", due to the to weak managerial responsiveness to the situation at hand being communicated to it. Because of this sometimes, the ultimate conclusion from the employee is that the conflict is futile, if not carrear ending in it's present form depending on the nature of the conflict or conflicts.This conclusion pattern seems to spread thereafter, amongst many levels of conflicts, causing the employees doubt and to abandon the conflict or conflcits and move on to other employment. I agree that conflict MUST be present if there are changes to occour. But even in low level issues avoidance sometimes becomes “Default”, due to the to weak managerial responsiveness to the situation at hand being communicated to it. Because of this sometimes, the ultimate conclusion from the employee is that the conflict is futile, if not carrear ending in it’s present form depending on the nature of the conflict or conflicts.This conclusion pattern seems to spread thereafter, amongst many levels of conflicts, causing the employees doubt and to abandon the conflict or conflcits and move on to other employment.

]]> By: Eva Rykr » Blog Archive » 10 Signs Your Team is Effective http://lancehaun.com/are-you-sure-you-want-to-resolve-conflict/#comment-2261 Eva Rykr » Blog Archive » 10 Signs Your Team is Effective Wed, 28 Apr 2010 17:36:36 +0000 http://rehaul.com/?p=1629#comment-2261 [...] members deal with conflict openly and productively; project-related conflict is seen as important to decision-making and personal [...] [...] members deal with conflict openly and productively; project-related conflict is seen as important to decision-making and personal [...]

]]> By: Aled Davies http://lancehaun.com/are-you-sure-you-want-to-resolve-conflict/#comment-2260 Aled Davies Tue, 30 Mar 2010 10:22:45 +0000 http://rehaul.com/?p=1629#comment-2260 Without conflict life would be pretty dull, conflict I agree is is a force for change. I think one of the main contributing factors are the assumptions we all make, as you eluded to. We assume that we are being micromanaged, we are therefore making assumptions about one's intent without checking it out with them. Our assumptions then take the form of stories in our head that lead us to make snap judgements and ultimately affect the inteaction we have. Checking out assumtions and inferences are key to nipping conflict in the bud. Without conflict life would be pretty dull, conflict I agree is is a force for change.

I think one of the main contributing factors are the assumptions we all make, as you eluded to. We assume that we are being micromanaged, we are therefore making assumptions about one’s intent without checking it out with them. Our assumptions then take the form of stories in our head that lead us to make snap judgements and ultimately affect the inteaction we have.

Checking out assumtions and inferences are key to nipping conflict in the bud.

]]> By: Stanley Lee » Blog Archive » Teamwork Series: Dealing with Team Conflict (3 of 4) http://lancehaun.com/are-you-sure-you-want-to-resolve-conflict/#comment-2259 Stanley Lee » Blog Archive » Teamwork Series: Dealing with Team Conflict (3 of 4) Wed, 17 Mar 2010 09:01:23 +0000 http://rehaul.com/?p=1629#comment-2259 [...] in one of his blog entries, sometimes conflicts should not be quashed; in fact, they may need to be encouraged in order to foster the required innovation to solve certain problems. As long as the team is united when presenting or showing a product or concept to the clients or [...] [...] in one of his blog entries, sometimes conflicts should not be quashed; in fact, they may need to be encouraged in order to foster the required innovation to solve certain problems. As long as the team is united when presenting or showing a product or concept to the clients or [...]

]]> By: Richard Nesnah http://lancehaun.com/are-you-sure-you-want-to-resolve-conflict/#comment-2258 Richard Nesnah Sat, 13 Mar 2010 01:41:32 +0000 http://rehaul.com/?p=1629#comment-2258 Should individual state government offices(NY) ever be permitted to handle harassment cases for their workers, because the mere fact of the possibility of the harassment comming from within, where everyone involved is connected to each other because of politics? Issues that are raised a lot of times are swept under the rug. They never get resolved. As you look at everything from a distance, you get the feeling that's the way it was intended to happen.It is interesting, dysfunctional at it seems.As one looks at things, it is an eye opener nonetheless. For it seems government makes laws on one hand and on the other, does everything in it's power to prevent those laws from being enforced effectively.It also explains the trouble New York government has been having for years. Should individual state government offices(NY) ever be permitted to handle harassment cases for their workers, because the mere fact of the possibility of the harassment comming from within, where everyone involved is connected to each other because of politics? Issues that are raised a lot of times are swept under the rug. They never get resolved. As you look at everything from a distance, you get the feeling that’s the way it was intended to happen.It is interesting, dysfunctional at it seems.As one looks at things, it is an eye opener nonetheless. For it seems government makes laws on one hand and on the other, does everything in it’s power to prevent those laws from being enforced effectively.It also explains the trouble New York government has been having for years.

]]> By: 10 Signs Your Team is Effective | The QuickBase Blog http://lancehaun.com/are-you-sure-you-want-to-resolve-conflict/#comment-2257 10 Signs Your Team is Effective | The QuickBase Blog Mon, 01 Mar 2010 15:22:25 +0000 http://rehaul.com/?p=1629#comment-2257 [...] members deal with conflict openly and productively; project-related conflict is seen as important to decision-making and personal [...] [...] members deal with conflict openly and productively; project-related conflict is seen as important to decision-making and personal [...]

]]> By: How to Deal With Big Jerks | Modite http://lancehaun.com/are-you-sure-you-want-to-resolve-conflict/#comment-2256 How to Deal With Big Jerks | Modite Wed, 17 Feb 2010 03:02:33 +0000 http://rehaul.com/?p=1629#comment-2256 [...] been there – short glimpses of what it would be like to be a total creep – so I reply with deference to big mean jerks if at all [...] [...] been there – short glimpses of what it would be like to be a total creep – so I reply with deference to big mean jerks if at all [...]

]]> By: Guy Farmer http://lancehaun.com/are-you-sure-you-want-to-resolve-conflict/#comment-2255 Guy Farmer Sun, 14 Feb 2010 08:22:43 +0000 http://rehaul.com/?p=1629#comment-2255 Great post Lance. A you've noted, conflict is an excellent opportunity to work on things. I find that companies perhaps overlook the idea that conflict is never about the surface issue and always about the stuff that is deeper. It's almost as if we put a bunch of people in a room who all mean well but who are working out their family problems on each other. Consequently, you have people who are reacting to situations but trying to fix very different things. Some people may have issues around power and control, for example, or others might have a need for acceptance. I find that if you work with people on how to get rid of all the noise that gets in the way of resolving conflicts they can start realizing how effectively they can work together to actually fix stuff. Take care, Guy Great post Lance. A you’ve noted, conflict is an excellent opportunity to work on things. I find that companies perhaps overlook the idea that conflict is never about the surface issue and always about the stuff that is deeper. It’s almost as if we put a bunch of people in a room who all mean well but who are working out their family problems on each other. Consequently, you have people who are reacting to situations but trying to fix very different things.

Some people may have issues around power and control, for example, or others might have a need for acceptance. I find that if you work with people on how to get rid of all the noise that gets in the way of resolving conflicts they can start realizing how effectively they can work together to actually fix stuff.

Take care,

Guy

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